Tuesday, April 21, 2009

"The strong cold current of air feels so nice as it hits my face and body. The tail of my shirt flapping and moving as the strong currents of air bully it around. i close my eyes, spread my arms wide and tilt my head up as i feel the wind hit my body. I dont mind the coldness as i'm accustomed to cold, with eveything in my life being so cold that ice would feel like fire in comparison. I open my eyes and stare at the sky"

--

"I look down.

Its a 5 storey drop to the ground. I wonder what it would feel like to have the wind whistling in my ears. What it would feel like to be oblivious to existence and creation? Would it be nice not to have any regrets or disappointments?"

--

These is a excerpts from a previous post (originally posted on another of my blogs). I often wonder what is it like to live on the edge. U ask, "On the edge of what?" On the edge of life and death my friend. To live on the edge of danger, knowing full well that life could end at any moment.

What would one think? Is there any protocol to be followed? If there is, is it hard-wired into our DNA? Do we think of our life and what we have done in it or with it? Do we think of and fear judgment day? Do we analyze our deeds and try to guess if we'll goto heaven or hell? Do we think of those people we'll hurt by leaping to our death?

The only people who can tell us have sadly gone to the world beyond. The only way left to us is to experiment. But standing at the edge without any motive would actually not trigger those thoughts. So we remain at a loss. We still don't know what we'll think.

Would our whole life actually flash before our eyes at the time of death? Come on!! how can so many years of experiences, thoughts and feeling actually flash before us in those moments just before death releases us. I think thats bullshit.

I think at the time of death we'd mostly be thinking if we made the right decision, if we could have avoided an abrupt end to realisation. After all, the limited senses of people allows them to remember and understand only one life at a time (provided there are multiple lives). So to them any escape from existence is frightening because the human body knows just one existence. To us the thought of oblivion or the lack of awarness of creation, or existence or feelings or emotions is very frightening as these are the things that rule us. This is why we're afraid of death.

But still the question of what we would think at the time of death or at the edge when we know death is a real or eminent possibility, remains unanswered. Would we think of lost opporunities? Would an enternal pessimist think optimistically and regret his loss of opportunities?

We know we are biological machines. Death just signifies the end of all chemical reactions in our bodies. So why make such a big deal out of it? Why think so much of what will happen after death or think so much just before it? It might just be a reaction of the mind in a last attempt at preventing the permanent shutting down of the body? Is that why fear of death is hard-wired into us? I think this is probably the most plausible explanation possible at this time.

So to prevent the body, and thereby itself, from destruction, the mind likes to thinks of reason why life would be more preferable.

-> SJ

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